I prefer NOT, thank you

Hi, Fabulous Food Blogger! [crawly bum lick]

I’m with a media research company outside Washington, D.C. One of our clients recently made us aware of your food/cooking blog and thought you might benefit from inclusion in our database for public relations professionals. Could you please let me know if this the email address where you prefer to receive culinary news and tips?

I already have more than enough spam already

Some people just don't take a Cold Shoulder for an answer

Hi X and X,

[yep - they really did call us by our first initials - how lame. How rude!]

Just wanted to make sure this message wasn’t getting sent to a spam folder. I would be happy to help you install Xxxxx on your blog today! Quick recap:

-blah blah blah

Please let me know how I can help, or what your decision might be. I’m always happy to answer any questions, and feedback is greatly appreciated.

Have a sunny weekend,

Water Sommeliers

Dear PR - a water sommelier? Give us a break.

Hi. I hope you are doing well. I’m not sure if you are still writing about the XXX Food Festival, but if you are, I wanted to get in touch to see if you would be interested in "Bottled Water Brand" and its presence at the festival, including never-before-seen “water sommeliers.” Below, I’ve included a couple of pictures (if you are interested, I can send you more), as well as the press release. Please let me know if you’re interested in covering this. Thanks!

You won't be hearing from me, never fear.

Thanks for sharing the way you feel, with a stranger

Perhaps if I ignore you, you'll feel hard done by, too.

Hello,

My name is Xxxxx Xxxxxx from Xxxxxx Xxxxx. I'm came across your reputable website through a Google search and feel as though we'd be an excellent addition.

I'm interested in exchanging resources; if you could contact me back at your earliest convenience, that would be great. Feel free to send along any questions or concerns and I look forward to hearing back from you.

Just Give Up on Me

I am not interested, thank you...

"I just wanted to check back in with you, regarding the e-mail I sent last week about Xxxxx’s search. Since I didn’t hear a response from you, I wanted to ensure you received my e-mail and that my persistence is genuine.

I look forward to hearing from you, even if you’re not interested."

Keep looking forward, then, cos I ain't writing back.

Happy Endings at Chinese Restaurants...?

I am not sure where they are going with this. Yes, my mind is well attuned to innuendo and double entendre, however I still fail to see why the headline (above), infers something filthy as suggested by its writer (below):

Get your mind out of the gutter…we’re talking about desserts, and more specifically the confectionary creations of Xxxxxx Xxxx who recently joined Xxxxxxxxx Restaurant after several years at Xxxxxx Patisserie in Manhattan.