$195?! To Enter some Lame Blog Awards!

Y O U HAVE GOT TO BE KIDDING ME, RIGHT?
They aren't even announcing any prizes. If anyone takes part in this, I am going to laugh at them [btw 'Crap-eau' is my tongue-in-cheek name for these awards. It is not the official name, but it fittingly rhymes with the official name should you need a clue]...

Greetings!
Dust off your shelf and make room for a 'Crap-eau' Blog Award!

Be one of the first to enter the exclusive 'Crap-eau' Blog Award Contest, solely dedicated to honoring the creative and inspired art of blogging.

Entering is an easy 2 step process.

Step 1
Enter one or many of the 12 industry categories.
There is a fit for each and every blog, including:

• Arts & Design • Technology • Marketing & Advertising • Hobbies • Travel & Leisure • Entertaining

• Health & Beauty • Parenting • Real Estate & Development • Finance • News • Web Design & Development

Step 2
Select a blog award category from Best Industry to Best Opinion and enter to win.

Hundreds of deserving bloggers will be honored with a 'Crap-eau' Blog Award. And one blog will be named 2009 "Most Brilliant Blog"!

Who better to judge the most innovative, creative and informative blogs than the readers who are active in the blogosphere? That's right, those involved in the blogosphere will be the judges. No antiquated judging academy here!

A special discounted rate of $195 is available to bloggers who enter now !

But hurry this special early bird offer ends November 14, 2008.

To You We Tip our Crap-eau,
The Crap-eau Blog Awards Team

P.S. Crap-eau Blog Awards Call for Entries is now open ! 2 Steps is all it takes to enter now! Good Luck.

Johnny Testa - Seriously?

This summary is not available. Please click here to view the post.

Who Are These People? This isn't real food.

Err... Why would I care. My blog has close to zero processed food posts and so, tell me, why would I be interested in this disgusting-looking bag of snack?

--

Good Morning, MyName,

It's official! Tiki Barber, Terry Bradshaw, Chris Daughtry, and Charlie Villanueva are among the Nation's favorite bald and beautiful celebrities, per the first phase of THE BALD AND THE BEAUTIFUL™ SWEEPSTAKES. Thousands of online nominations were cast, but only these shiny-surfaced stars were among the top four selected!

Phase two of the Sweepstakes now puts these celebrities head-to-head to duke it out for Americans' votes and the right to be named the Nation's baldest, most beautiful entertainer. To participate, voters can visit the XXXXX™ Snacks Web site, now through November 6, 2008 and fill out an official entry, which also will qualify them for a chance to win not only delicious XXXX™ Snacks' products, but also a fun family getaway for four!

I've included the press release below for your review, but if you should have any additional questions or needs, including images and logos, please do not hesitate to contact me.

Don't worry - I won't hesitate NOT to contact you.

Google Page Rank Boaster: exchange for a "temporary" link

exchange for a "temporary" link - gee thanks for your so kind offer.

Hello,

My name is xxxxx and I work for a company called xxxxxxxx Toys, a specialist manufacturer of xxxxxx xxxxxxxxxxx toys. We found your website and are interested in a three-way link exchange. If you place our link on your site, I will reciprocate a link back to your site (may be a subpage or homepage) with whatever link text you desire on our Google PageRank 4 directory,

Link exchange is usually an arduous process, so we have made a system that is quick. If you are interested in exchanging a link follow these instructions:

1 - Go to this URL:
2 - Place our link on your site as instructed on the above URL
3 - Once you have added the link fill in the form with your link details

Once these steps are completed your link will be live. There are no lengthy processes, just quick and easy links. You will be given 3 links in our directory: 1 on your own listing, 1 on your category listing and a temporary link on our PageRank 4 homepage.

If you have any issues, please email me at:

Yours sincerely

xxxxx xxxxxxx
xxxxxxxx Toys

Beating About the Bush?

Dear MyName & HisName

I'm going to forward your email to xxxxx & xxxxxxxx and ask them to send you a copy of my new Spanish cookbook xxxx xxx xxx.

I enjoy Your Blog Name and think you might like my book.

If you would like a copy and don't hear from x&x let me know and I'll get on to them!

Kind regards

xxxxx

Lies

We are sending you this email because you requested to receive information about XXX Wonderful promotions, offers and health benefits. [bullshit] You may unsubscribe at any time by clicking xxx

Because we value your opinion, we would like to invite you to complete a short survey. In return, we are giving away a limited number of coupons for a free bottle of XXX Wonderful 100% Juice.

Thank you for participating,

XXX Wonderful

Very, very good try.

I like this one a lot. I ain't falling for it, but I like it!

I’ve been following your “Eat Local Challenge” and love the photos that accompany them- particularly the xxx! Just looking at it is making me hungry for lunch! For eating local for the entire month of October, why not break your locavore diet with the most irresistible culinary treat possible- the tartufi bianchi! Continue your support of local dining, while indulging in one of the world’s most desirable delicacies at xxx’s “Festa di xxxi” from November 11-15. After dedicating an entire month to eating local from a California perspective, why not see how it would taste like to eat local in Piemonte!

PR@ Michael Bauer of the San Francisco Chronicle

"Not a day goes by that we don't get outlandish pitches from various PR firms, hoping someone will write about their clients. I'm all for promoting good products, but some pitches stretch so far they fall off the cliff, crashing and burning."

[Read on to find out which PR@ made Michael Bauer flip today]

Huh - he wants me to call him?

My blog clearly states where I am located - and it's on the opposite side of the country to NYC. Not sure why I would spend the cost of a phone call during my own free time, to call him and point this out to him.

Hey guys:

My name is XXXX and I work with multiple restaurants around NYC. My PR company represents XXX Bar & Restaurant, XXX Steak House, and XXX Grill to name a few. I was wondering if there was a number I could reach you at to discuss alternative services you or your blog may provide and upcoming events at some of our restaurants. My number is xxx. Feel free to give me a call so we can discuss where you are located and if you are interested in writing in your blog about our partners. Thank you and I look forward to talking to you.

Nice Try

Dear MyName,

For some of your readers, cutting taxes and slashing the deficit sound great. But, we think that many more will find it's a lot more fun to slice into a big orange pumpkin – particularly at this time of year.

That's why we, the interactive companion to XXXXX magazine, would like to invite you to vote in our straw poll for Halloween of pumpkin carving stencils of Barack Obama, Joe Biden, John McCain and Sarah Palin. And we'd like you to encourage all of your visitors to vote in our straw poll, too. The poll results will be announced October 29, 2008.

Why are we doing this? Well, we'd like to ensure that everyone enjoys great holidays without the hassle. And we wouldn't mind if you linked to our stencils, too.

I am a food blog, not a wedding business

is pleased to offer you a complimentary, professional wedding business listing for FREE! As a listed business your profile is setup properly for maximum search engine exposure as well as a comprehensive spot on today\'s fastest growing and fastest moving wedding websites on google\'s search engines,

Easy Money

Hi, came across your site and thought it would be more than fantastic for one of our clients. If interested in an advertising venture please feel free to contact me. Very easy money to be made.

xxxxx xxxxx | Junior Search Executive

STOP SHOUTING AT ME

HELLO,
I AM CHRISTINA XXXXXXX FROM PENNSYLVANIA AND I WILL LIKE TO KNOW IF YOU CARRY COTTEN DRAWSTRING BAGS FOR SALE.AND IF YES,REPLY ME BACK WITH YOUR WEBSITE SO THAT I CAN SELECT THE ONE THAT I WILL LIKE TO ORDER,ALSO I AM SHIPPING THE COTTEN DRAWSTRING BAGS TO ONE OF MY COMPANY IN WEST AFRICA AND I WILL RECOMMEND A FREIGHT COMPANY FOR THE PICKED UP.THANK YOU AND HOPE TO HEAR FROM YOU SOON..

BEST REGARD
CHRISTINA XXXXXXX

Merry Meatballs

In honor of the Holiday Season; show off your best festive meatball recipe by entering the XXX “Merry Meatballs” Holiday Recipe Contest sponsored by XXX. Each recipe must use home style, Italian style or sausage-flavored XXX Meatballs. Entries will be judged on creativity, suitability for holiday entertaining, and eye and taste.

Is this something you can tell your readers? I can also supply more information.

Better, Probably, to Ask Me, not Him.

Hello "Name of my beloved, the one I write about, not the one who actually writes the blog",

After many long hours, pounds of chocolate and gallons of coffee – "ournewsite".com is live.

We wanted to let you know that we are aggregating "Your Blog Name". "ournewsite".com is part of the Network and we aggregate only the best of San Francisco. Your take on Food & Wine has contributed to "ournewsite".com rich local perspective. There are unique ways for you to promote your blog and engage San Franciscoites on critical, local issues.

Here are three ways that you can use "ournewsite".com:

1. You can build exposure for your blog. Using our NewsMinr Plugin you can summarize one of your blog posts, with a link back to your blog, and add it to the Articles + Opinions section – the most active articles are sent to the SanFranciscoIAM homepage.

2. You can record and post webcam commentary on local issues that you find crucial, relevant, exciting or infuriating.

3. You can create a Group around your blog or around specific issues.

Unbiased reviews in return for Payment? Hmm.

Hello,

I'm the webmaster of XXX
I wanted to know if by any chance you would be interested in doing an unbiased review of our site on your blog "my blog name"
If you agree we will send you a payment for the review.

Please let me know if you are interested.

Thank you

If you want to receive more paid review proposals, just click the following link: